Monday, November 21, 2011

Wheels of change keep on turning

What a difference a weekend can make. Friday I posted about us waiting until July to try to start making a baby and in just 3 short days that date has changed. We are now going to start in April. Michael and I had quite the discussion last night. While I whole-heartedly agree with all of his reasoning, one of the number one reasons I’ve been so eager to start trying is because I want my child to know my grandmother (while she’s currently in decent health, I know there will come a time-much sooner than I’m willing to deal with when she’s not with us). There are no words available that describe how much this lady means to me. Honestly, every time I think about the possibility of my child never knowing her it brings me to tears, and if that doesn’t do it, taking the thought a step further and knowing that my child will never know my grandfather (he passed away when I was in 5th grade) just breaks my heart. I was definitely a granddaddy’s baby. I remember the smell of his truck, those old overalls he wore all the time, his green John Deer hat, the smell of his aftershave, and the roughness of his hands. To say that I miss him really only scratches the surface, but the thought of my child never meeting him-or her- just breaks my heart. While I know that this is no reason to rush into having a baby, Michael and I are both ready. We’ve come to an entirely new place in the last several months with this decision. For Michael it went from being not no, but absolutely no to now he’s excited about the possibility but cautious and wants to make sure that we are doing everything possible to do what’s best for our future baby-and family! Our reasons for waiting this long are financial-as I stated on Friday. Thankfully, God has been so amazing in the last year (really when isn’t God amazing). He’s blessed us so much-and continues to-and has put us in a position where we are financially okay where we are if we got pregnant today; we just wanted to add a little cushion. Now, the fact that we are moving up the “start” date does not mean that we aren’t going to continue to do everything possible to pay off our car and pay down our student loans. Those are still our goals. However, we understand that with all of the doors that have been opened in the last month or so we will be able to do that in June. So whether we are pregnant then or still trying to get pregnant it doesn’t really affect our ability to make that goal a reality. Now, the real question: What does that make my weight loss goal look like? It makes it a little less likely to drop 40 pounds-I’m just being realistic-but I am going to do EVERYTHING in my power to get as close to it as possible. Now, let me back up, when I say everything I don’t mean I’m going to do anything unhealthy like upchuck or take diet pills, but I’m going to make sure that I’m eating right and working out. As a matter of fact, as of this morning my Beach Body challenge has begun. Bring on the change! I know WHATEVER change happens it’s for the good because it’s creating a healthier environment for Baby Fox.

Friday, November 18, 2011

Dancing my way right back into this!

What a difference a year can make. This time last year I was finishing up school and praying to find a job. We’d just moved into our house and we had just celebrated our 3rd anniversary. In just 12 months man has there been change. I graduated, I got a full time job with only minimal downtime between graduation and starting work, and we moved from being that couple that wasn’t even talking about kids to the couple who has planned when we are going to start trying to make a baby. How is it that so much can change in just mere months? Furthermore, a few weeks ago I had dinner with a girl friend of mine from high school that I hadn’t seen since graduation. It dawned on me as I was making my way to the restaurant that I graduated high school nearly ten years ago. I’ve gotten a degree, I’ve married an amazing man, we’ve purchased a house, I’ve made LOADS of stupid mistakes and dumb choices, but how in the world has it been 10 years. It seems like yesterday we were walking across that stage. So I take a step back and put into perspective-yes, tons of things of changed in the last 12 months but man how things have changed in the last 10 years. It’s times like these that I look back and reflect on that old saying “if only I could go back knowing what I know now.” Although, I have to admit, I wouldn’t have changed a thing. Why? Because I wouldn’t be the person I am now and be married to the man I’m married to and have the love, admiration, and appreciation I have for him without having been through the hell I went through. This reflection is also important for me to ponder as I look back thinking “how in the world has it been 10 years” because the next 6 months are going to be quite the challenge to make it through. Michael and I initially decided to starting trying to have a baby December 1st-yup, just two measly weeks from now. However, after a much needed conversation back in late August we decided to put that plan on hold in an attempt to pay off our car before we started trying. Now, what you must understand is that me coming to that agreement with him was by far one of the hardest “compromises” I’ve ever had to make in my life. We have been married for 4 years and I’ve been ready to start a family for three of them. Needless to say, our conversation led us to the paying off the car agreement because we both understand that while one is never financially “ready” for a baby, there are steps you can take to prepare yourself and to put yourself in a better position. We also aren’t exactly the best when it comes to making a plan and sticking to it. Generally I set my sights on something and then in one way or another I get my way. Luckily, this time around Michael stood his ground-firmly! We sort of took this “plan” as an opportunity to show ourselves that we are ready to do whatever it takes to make sure that we are in the best place possible before we start a family. We know life happens. We know the unexpected will happen. But, our car will be paid off. We technically don’t finish paying for the car until February 2013. However, we’ve been taking the steps of making extra payments and doing what we can to pay it off by June 2012. And seriously, God has truly blessed that decision. I’ve had a peace about our decision and on top of that doors have been opening left and right providing us more and more opportunities to make additional payments-from bonuses at work to Michael getting a design job on the side-just a single project but hey, every penny counts, to him being able to “sell” 40 hours of vacation time for an extra check. I’m not going to lie, two weeks from now I’m probably going to be quite emotional, but, in the long run I know our waiting is the right choice. And the waiting is actually the entire purpose of this post. As we have 7 and a half months before we start trying and I want to drop at least 40 pounds before we get pregnant I thought what better time than now to take on the BeachBodyChallenge. An old church friend recently challenged severalfacebook friends to the challenge and 5 of us have accepted. We start on Monday and I’m PSYCHED. So psyched that I started a little early. Since Monday I’ve been doing the workouts-Turbo Fire and ChaLEAN Extreme-in an effort tosort of familiarize myself with them before we get into full swing. I’ve also been without soda since Monday. It’s the baby steps, really! Anywho, this morning I started the Turbo Fire Inferno kick start plan and I’m looking forward to the next 5 days with that eating plan before getting into the meal plans. I’m going to be tracking my progress with photos, measurements, and weight and I’m going to be sharing it with you. What better way to stay accountable than to make it public knowledge, right? The calendar is marked for July 1 (or whenever mother nature so desires to allow ovulation during July) for Operation Baby Fox to start sothe race is on! My goal? To be in a better state health wise. To create an environment that is the healthiest possible for carrying! The wake up call? No one can do this for me-losing the weight or carrying the baby. It’s up to me. What better reason to get fit than to create a human life? Here’s to the journey. I’ll be posting workouts and food journals and I ask that you help keep me accountable. If I eat something that I shouldn’t, call me out on it. Have recipe ideas? Share them with me.

I’m standing at the starting line and I’ve got my shoes on and laced up! I’m ready for the whistle!