Work vs. Family, or both?

So, nearly one week into work and I’m already wondering where the time has gone. It’s been several years since I’ve worked a 40 hour week (not to say I didn’t have 40 hour weeks between work and school). I totally forgot how quickly the week flies by-wasn’t it just Monday? Don’t get me wrong, I’m not complaining; I just simply wonder where our time goes. Beyond that I wonder: is it worth it? We spend 40 (if we are lucky) hours a week at work-basically from sun up to sun down in the winter-get home, have a few hours to relax and then it’s off to bed to get up and repeat as we “work for the weekend” and get to enjoy 48 hours of bliss. Why can’t all of life be like the hours between quitting time on Friday and back to work time on Monday?

This very thought has led to quite a bit of contemplative thinking about where I am, where I’m going and how I’m going to get there. Michael and I are currently somewhere between our third and fourth year of marriage. We have no children (well, Jake, but he has four legs), we have just purchased our first home and we are very much enjoying our time as a family of 2. Most of the time. Other times-when friends announce they are pregnant, when shopping for baby showers, when meeting new people (and their children), etc…-I feel that sense of emptiness. Don’t get me wrong, my life is by no means empty (I have an INCREDIBLE husband and I love our life and our time together), but as a 26 (27 in April) year old female I am at a stage in life where having babies is something that is constantly on my mind. Long story short, this has led to thoughts of grad school and future career decisions. I’ve given a lot of consideration to getting my MAT in Education-I love children, teachers work 185 days a year, and they have 2 full months off in the summer. As I think more and more about children and the type of lifestyle I hope our family can have, the more I realize that I don’t want to work my life away-I want to be a mommy. No, I don’t want to be a FULL TIME stay at home mommy (I don’t think), but I want to have a say in my child’s life. I want to raise them-not have them raised by day care workers (absolutely nothing against day care workers-I was one-hence the first hand knowledge that they often spend more time with your children than you do). Who knows where I’ll end up. Obviously these are things that Michael and I will have to decide together, but these thoughts are just constantly bobbling around in my brain. Are the rest of you like that, incapable of shutting it off? I often find myself mid thought sharing something with Michael only to have him look completely dumbfounded because he has NO clue where the thought came from; I then have to back track to explain the thought and realize that it came from a connection of 100 other thoughts—oh the joys of being a woman. I know this isn’t quite like my normal postings but these thoughts were on my brain today (as they often are these days) and I thought who better to share them with! Especially since one of the reasons I’m on this journey is so that I can become as healthy as possible so that, as a bonus, when we start trying to have babies my body is a great environment for baby to grow and thrive and after baby that I’m in great shape so I can enjoy every stage of life and not be confined by health. Just food for thought (not for belly) today! Until tomorrow: good eats and happy thoughts!

Wednesday Food Breakdown:

Breakfast was another bowl of oatmeal with maple syrup, chocolate chips, bananas, blueberries and walnuts (8 points).

Lunch was ½ an avocado/turkey bacon sandwich with alfalfa sprouts and cucumber (6 points) along with blackberries, an apple, and tortilla chips (4 points).

Snack was another 5 T of my trail mix (that stuff is SOOOOOOO delicious) for 5 points.

Dinner is going to be hamburgers (4 oz for 4 points of the 93/7 ground beef; mine without the bun) topped with onions (most likely grilled) and avocados (2) served with baked beans (1/2 cup for 3 points) and ½ a sweet potato (2 points). At a total of 11 points it puts me at 34 for the day using 5 extra weekly points. (Remember : I don’t calculate workout points so tonight’s workout of P90x Shoulders and Arms isn’t calculated into these points)